Funny How?

Every so often life is funny in unexpected ways.

Mix All Ingredients

I spend a lot of time laying in bed on my left or right side to prevent bedsores. The problem is keeping the stuff in front, my "man goods", from being crushed. I'm always asking my caregivers, "Not crushing my man goods are we"? Well every so often someone doesn't hear the question clearly. Yesterday my caregiver thought she heard this "Not crushing my main ingredients are we"? Main ingredients?? Well wait a minute. If you think about it.... That's funny.

Blowing Bubbles

Long time ago I had a caregiver named M. She sweated a lot. I mean a lot!! Sometimes when she was giving me a bath I couldn't tell if it was water dripping on me or her sweat. Gross I know. After her I got another caregiver. This one had allergies. Sniff Sniff Sniff Sniff. So now instead of sweat, I have to worry about snot bubbles dripping on me. OH!!! I know, super gross!! Life is funny.

Super Duper Pooper Tent

We should all know that a pup tent is a small tent. When I'm laying on my side at night, we have to make a pup tent with my sheets behind my rear end. We'll it's not really a pup tent. It's a poop tent! You know, just in case my bowels decide to self evacuate in the middle of the night. Get it? It's a pup tent for my poop. It's a poop tent! Now that's damn funny!

Back In The Box

Now this last one may be a question of perspective. 10 years ago my Dad passed away from acute leukemia. He wanted to be cremated and had some practical thoughts about it. First he didn't see any reason to pay for a coffin if you're just going to burn it. He also saw no reason to dress him up in his best suit just to set fire to it as well. Therefore the last time I saw him he was in his hospital gown and a cardboard box.

Now who knows why the brain thinks the things it thinks at moments like this? My first thought was, "Huh, I don't think this cheap cardboard box is going to be strong enough to ship him all the way back to the manufacturer in?" Seemed like kind of a silly thought to me at the time. I mean it's not exactly like we got the wrong item in the mail and now we have to ship him back its it?

So sometimes, just sometimes, life is funny.